I hope everyone is having a wonderful week. I’m enjoying the ‘fall like’ temperatures. Thank you so much for your e-mails and best wishes for my Mom. She’s feeling much better!
I’ve been receiving many e-mails from my female readers about a topic other than ‘dating.’ They’re asking what to do when one their girlfriends becomes too obsessive and interferes with their daily lives. I’ve also had a few e-mails from my male readers regarding this similar topic. One guy wrote that he has a male friend he’s known for five years that wants to hang out with him all the time whenever he goes out with his buddies. My single and divorced readers didn’t know how to handle this type of situation. I’m enclosing my reply.
I’m also enclosing a story from my humor book, ‘Still Dating.’ People are always asking me how to find Mr. or Miss Right. I always say if you do the things you enjoy doing, the right person may just be out there enjoying those same things! For instance, I enjoy going to the movies and the theater, especially musicals. But, I enjoy outdoor activities too. I enjoy taking long walks and working out at the health club. I meet a lot of nice guys while taking walks outside and working out in the club. A friend of mine tried online dating. I tried this and met some nice guys.
I talked to a guy on the phone before we met. He said he enjoyed Playing the drums in his friend’s band. The band was called the ‘Panther’s.’ He delivered Packages for a living. He liked to wear shirts with Pockets. He enjoyed Pasta and Pizza. He liked Popcorn. He enjoyed shooting Pool. He asked me if I had Plans for the evening. I replied, “Yes, Please understand, I have to read the Paper.”
Dear Debbie Sue: 'One of my girlfriends, I’ve known for only a year is becoming very possessive. We met at a ballet class. We used to enjoy hanging out alone, going to movies and parties. Lately, if I invite her with me and my friends, she keeps asking them to go out without me. She asks for their phone number and email and keeps bothering them. It’s very annoying that she can’t leave my friends alone. She also buys similar clothes that I buy and eats at the same restaurants! The other day she asked for my boyfriend’s phone number! Should I end the friendship? I have plenty of good friends without her.' Judith
Dear Judith, It sounds like you know the answer already. If this girlfriend keeps interfering with your friends and your life, speak to her about your feelings. Explain to her that you would like her to leave your friends alone. Tell her she needs to wear clothes that are ‘her own’ style, not yours. She needs to find her own boyfriend and leave yours alone. Imitation is the best form of flattery, but not in this case. Your girlfriend obviously is lonely. She needs to have a life of her own. Explain this to her and if she continues to interfere with your friends-end the friendship with her and hang out with your other good friends.
To Ken who asked for a private reply: Your new buddy that keeps interfering with your life needs his own life. I would definitely hang out with your ‘lifelong’ buddies and leave this new one behind. Eventually, he’ll stop calling you and he’ll leave you alone.
Until next time.. ‘Keep Smiling!’
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Join Debbie at her comedy show on October 19th at Curt’s Café’ 2922 Central Street in Evanston at 7pm.